That's a lot of Sex on the Beach

(beginning MARCH2009)In South America, you won't find watered down beverages or bars closing at one or two like in plenty of places located in North America; here, drinking is taken to a different level, so prepare yourself adequately before you venture out into the night life.

Although I have been to many places that serve alcohol in South and Central America, I'll focus my story on my favorite place, Montanita, Ecuador.

Here the drink specials, or 'happy hour' would literally run from 4pm until the restaurant closed at 12pm... And the specials? Go ahead and get yourself TWO drinks for between 3 and 4 USD. Now, these aren't ordinary drinks, they are really about 95% alcohol and 5% whatever mixings you throw in. If I wasn't planning on getting shit-faced, I only needed ONE of these suckers to do the job. Can't beat a deal like that.

The nightclubs were a much different story. You couldn't find a single person in the clubs before one AM, and most of the dancing wouldn't begin until much later. Many times my friend and I would be eating breakfast at 9AM, to see our friends, still drunk, returning back from their adventures at the clubs; sometimes they would come directly from the clubs to go work! Now that's what I call some real hard-core clubbing.

 One time, my friend and I decided to try a new place, where they had a pitcher deal of a mixed drink for 8USD. We asked how big the pitcher was, and, misleadingly, the guy only spreads his hands apart about 6 inches. We decide to get Sex on the Beach, thinking that we could most certainly handle this tiny pitcher.

What gets brought out to us is not a tiny pitcher at all, but a full-sized pitcher, the kind that one would fill up with lemonade or water when entertaining a bunch of guests. Not the kind I would expect would be filled with a very strong mixed drink and costing 8 USD. The outcome: we had to invite some of our friends to join us, because my friend and I did not want the added bonus of taking a trip to the hospital. And if you think you're ready to take on a pitcher of Sex on the Beach, I'd like to see you try.