Agnes' Story

"It was in the morning, very early, and we heard a loud bang at the door. We woke up only to find that we had been surrounded by the rebels. There had been reports that the rebels were coming closer to the school, but that night we had been assured that we would be fine and that the army would protect us. The rebels locked the doors and there was nowhere for us to run. We tried to hide under the bed, but eventually they came and pulled one of the girls outside. They asked her to show where the rest of the people are. They found the rest of us and pulled us out one by one from under the bed, about eight of us. I remember very well, I was the first to be tied up. The soldiers were not there, we didn’t see any of them, or policemen. The rebels told us that they were going to kill some of us as a sacrifice. Fortunately, none of us were killed right there. They took off with us, and we walked until morning. It was very far.

The second day, I saw a person killed for the first time. They found a beggar and chopped him into pieces. And what they did, they called us. Because we were the real abductees, and whenever they want to kill, they want us to see, because they tell us “This is what will happen if you try to escape, or if the spirits tell us something bad about you.” We walked several days into the bush, then we met the major group of the rebels. There were so many that I could not believe. But only a few of them were trained soldiers; a majority of them were abducted like us.

We were the rebels' wives. If you were beautiful they would give you to a high-ranking officer. Otherwise they would leave you there, and whoever wanted you would beat you up and rape you as they pleased. Me and another two girls were given to a division commander, he was simply called “Man.” He was not a very good guy, and had no mercy, was the kind of guy who you know would kill you any time. It was difficult to run away. Even when we got ambushed by the army, the rebels would appoint a person to guard the abductees. While we were walking, we were starving, thirsty, losing energy, losing weight, and even uprooting food was a problem. Yet if you did not uproot, the rebels claimed that you were supporting the army and would kill you, even if it was only because you lacked the energy to dig. All of my toenails were eventually ripped off from walking so many miles.

Me personally I don’t think there is any suffering on earth that can be equal to that. I was in captivity for three months. One of the things I saw, we went to my mom’s village. Now when we went there, there was my uncle, my real uncle, and they got him and no one knew that it was my mother’s village, and you could not even tell them. So they stole from him and they killed him. I saw my own uncle being killed. And I could not say anything or they would kill me. One of the girls that was abducted attempted to sneak away, and she was caught. So they brought her, they put her in front of us, and told us that they were going to kill her because she tried to escape. And you cannot image your classmate being put to death while you are watching, and they told us “You have to see.” They tied her hands behind her back. Then they used a knife attached to a gun, it was so sharp. They stabbed her over and over again, mostly through the chest. And she died. And they told us, do not cry. Anybody who cried for that girl would follow the same way. So you could only cry in your heart.

One of my best friends two weeks later developed deep wounds around the thighs. We tried to heal them; we put Vaseline on them so that maybe it could reduce the friction. But it was impossible. The rebels saw her wounds and said that she was worthless, that they had to kill her. And you cannot believe, you cannot plead for your friend because if you try to plead you also go to death with her. So they said they were going to kill her and they killed her, they chopped her. My best friend was cut up before my eyes.

Me I remember what was weird going on in my mind that they are probably going to kill me. Because if they can kill other people, I am not special compared to other people. So any time they said they were going to kill me, they would kill me. Because I was seeing no other way that I could escape. So by that time I accepted that I would die. Because you cannot imagine your life continuing with such suffering. But I wondered, will I ever go back to my home? Will I ever see my parents again? Will I ever see my brothers and my sisters?

One day, we woke up in the bush to see that we had been surrounded by the army. But when we talk of sleeping, we were not in a house, but laying anywhere in the bush, no blankets, materials, or anything. You get leaves from the tree and you sleep, after walking the whole day. But that particular day, even the watchdog rebels in the trees did not see the soldiers come, and before we knew it we were surrounded. So we woke up and the rebels began fighting with the army. I ran away as fast I could, and all of the sudden, I was all alone in the middle of the bush. And I thought, “what am I going to do?” I have no idea where I am, and there are no signs of home around. So I ran and ran, and eventually I slept.

I woke up around 3 a.m. What was coming to my mind was, either the rebels would find me and kill me, soldiers would fine me and kill me, or wild animals would kill me. So I just walked. I decided to climb trees, like the rebels had. They used to tell us that if you climb a tree and see one smoke pillar, then it is a home. So I climbed a tree and saw smoke, and began walking towards it. Anytime I got lost, we climbed a tree again. By the time I reached a home, it was deserted. I went inside and laid down, and the owners of the home returned. They saw us and thought we were rebels, and ran away. The next day the owner man came back, and we pleaded “no we are not rebels.” The man said, “the rebels are not very far from here. If they catch you, they will kill you.” So he locked us inside of the house. They came back in the evening and prepared food for us, and then left again and locked us inside.

The next day, we began walking. We hadn’t even walked 500 meters, and the rebels had come back. And you know what they did? That man had a wife and two children, only boys in the garden. They killed them. Another of the sons managed to run away and yelled at us, “the rebels are coming!” And we ran. We ran so fast. Eventually we reached the town market. We met the soldiers and eventually they took us to the detachment, where we slept for two days. That was the first time we started getting medical treatment.

The next day, they took us to meet our parents. But I had to go back to the hospital, because I had so many wounds. Having said this, I am telling you, it is very traumatizing, especially when I came back, I was having difficulty with friends. In school people would point at you and say, “this one was in the bush.” And it was very hard. And whenever you fall sick, you wonder, is it HIV? But in the end I thank God every day that I came out, no pregnancy, no AIDS. And today, I am married, I have two kids, and I will be going for my master’s this fall at Makerere. So what I normally tell people, because some people once they get abducted they lose hope. But don’t lose hope. It is not the end of your life. There is life even after abduction."